Tag Archives: #natefish #israel #baseball #israelbaseball #kingofjewishbaseball

THE ADJUSTMENT

26 Jun

It’s Wednesday, June 26th. It’s been almost a week since I arrived here in Israel.  I am getting used to it, I think.  To use a baseball term, I am making the adjustment.  Here are 5 things I have learned so far.

1. Israelis love the Doors.

Most people would concern themselves with things considered more practical, but my two biggest fears moving here were that there wasn’t Wash-N-Fold, and the radio would be bad.  Not sure about Wash-N-Fold, yet, but my worst FM nightmares have come true right before my ears.  It’s all Israeli folk music and minimal European techno and a strange mix of American pop music including the Doors and…

2. Israelis love Depeche Mode.

I have not figured out the particular commonality between all this music that appeals to Israelis.  But in addition to to Depeche Mode and the Doors, they seem to like anything that loosely refers to revolution.  I have heard the Beatles’, “Come Together”, and Stevie Wonder’s “Master Blaster” multiple times, and some Bob Marley, thank goodness.

3. The roads are well designed.

I have always heard Israelis are bad drivers, and they are, don’t get me wrong, but the roads are nice at least.  And they’re not as bad as New Yorkers…

4. The country is FULL of bad sculpture.

I have know this for a while, from previous trips.  It’s everywhere, unavoidable.  Around every corner there is another giant steal monster staring down at you, twisted metal shoulders, eyeballs of recycled weapons, barb-wire feet, chicken-wire arms.

5. It’s hot.

It’s hot as hell here.  And getting hotter in July and August.  We are, and I have to remind myself of this, in the desserts and oases of the Middle East.

But that’s enough music and art talk, for now.  This blog is about baseball, damnit.  Eventually it will even be about all the amazing people here in Israel that make playing baseball in a non-baseball playing country possible, but for now, and this is the danger of blogging, it is about me.

Each morning, I wake up, and go for coffee here…

my cafe

the cafe

When I need food, I go here.

the store

the store

I live here, for now.

home

home

This is my plate and glass and pot and pan and 2 cups.

IMG_0201

We had a meeting last night.  There is a lot to do.  Practice tonight with the Juniors. People to meet.  Camps.  Games.  And I am focused on my divined duties as the sovereign ruler of the Kingdom of Jewish Baseball.  But I must tell you, Ladies and Geese, it can be lonely being a King of Jewish Baseball.  So, for now, and for always, you are my friend, and I am yours.  And this is life.

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THE KINGDOM OF JEWISH BASEBALL

22 Jun

Ladies and Geetles, faithful readers, the wait is over!   After a long, hard flight through -52 degree temperatures, 10,000 feet in air, no less, using just the marvel of modern technology known as an airplane, and a store bought cape and crown, of course, I,  King of All Jewish Baseball, have landed in Israel, and, following a thorough examination at Ben Gurion Airport– paperwork, IDs, photos, cavity search, and an archery test, have even magically been reborn a real Israeli citizen.

boom

boom

Tomorrow we have elections for the Board of Directors of the IAB, my collective boss moving forward.  And we have games Monday.  The Senior National Team and the Junior National Team are scrimmaging at Baptist Village.  At the ripe young age of 33, I begin my career with the last team I imagine I will play for, the Israeli Senior National Team.

I have not played in a game since the WBC last summer.

As you must know, after a year of faithful readership, I am coaching the USA Junior National Team for the upcoming Maccabi Games, THE GREAT CELEBRATION OF JEWISH SPORTSMANSHIP AND PAGEANTRY TO BE OBSERVED IN ISRAEL ON THE 3RD MOON OF JULY EVERY 4TH YEAR, aka the Jewish Olympics.  And the Israeli Junior National Team is also in the tournament.  So, Monday, I will be playing against the kids I will be coaching against in three weeks which conveniently provides me the opportunity to talk a little smack, I’M COMING FOR YOU GUYS.

I probably owe you an explanation of what the “Baptist Village” is, for one cannot casually drop such a phrase in conversation and expect the listener, or reader, to understand what a Baptist Village may be, but there’s no time for that.  The answers shall come, slowly.  And there will be lots of video to help.

For this moment, my life is unknown and simple.  I am sitting in front of 5 open suitcases with everything I own in them, and a laptop.   I just ate for dinner the same thing I ate for lunch, a turkey and hummus sandwich.  It reminds me of when I was playing in Germany, living in the mental hospital next to the field, preparing meals with Paulino, washing our one pan and one dish each.  I am suited for this.  Despite currently wearing thousands of dollars of fake gold jewelry, I do not need anything fancy.

Things will get more complicated, I am sure, beginning, well, tomorrow.

I now attempt my greatest trick, using only the power of the internet and a new camera and the brain of a baby genius, I will paint for you a beautiful picture of the Kingdom of Jewish Baseball.

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